How to Eat Molasses

I was in Bulk Barn the other day.  Shopping for gummy worms and barbeque peanuts. You know. The usual.

Tucked away in the back corner of the shop I noticed this bubbling couldron of gummy black shit. Seriously. There were bubbles rising from the depths.

Lucky for me Bulk Barn has conveniently labelled every single bin in the shop. I didn’t have to wait guessing for long. The bubbling, gummy black shit I was scooping into the small-sized container? “Black strap molasses.”

Super Food of the Gods

They don’t teach this one in school any more. So I know you heard it hear first. Black strap molasses is a super food of the gods. In fact, the word molasses is derived from the Latin word for honey, an original super food and godly elixer.

Molasses is a by product of the sugar making process. Black strap molasses comes from the third boiling of the sugar cane plant. So even though most of the sugar has been removed and sold to Coke and Pepsi, it’s still loaded with sugar. But it’s also loaded with all the good stuff you don’t find in pop: calcium, magnesium, potassium and iron. In fact, black strap molasses is so good for you that one tablespoon provides up to 20% of the daily value of each of these nutrients.

Clearly every single self respecting modern hippy on earth ought to be eating molasses by the bucketful. But how? How do you eat something that looks like an oil spill and tastes like burnt rubber?

I Don’t Even Really Like Baking

It didn’t take me long on Google to figure out that the only civilized way to eat black strap molasses is by baking with it.  Since I don’t even really like baking I opted for the easiest recipe I could find: molasses bran muffins. Now, since I’m running out of time and need to get ready for work, I’ll cut to the chase:  as disgusting they sound, molasses bran muffins are actually kind of tasty, in a molasses-y sort of way.

Have a great day.

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